Halsey is fed up — but not enough to shut up.
“Sometimes I give pieces of myself to everyone that I wish I could take back,” she lamented to Playboy. “As soon as I have my first child, articles will say, ‘Back in 2016, Halsey came out about having a miscarriage, so we’re very happy for her.’ I’ll be enjoying the happiest moment of my entire life, because I want to be a mom more than anything — if you told me tomorrow that I had to quit music but could have a happy family, I’d be like, ‘Sorry, guys, I’m out’ — and I know the press will ruin it.”
Despite not loving the media attention, the bisexual and biracial singer doesn’t regret opening up about her personal traumas if it helps other young women going through similar experiences.
“Every time I read a miscarriage story, it’s about a happily married woman who loses a baby, and that’s f—king terrible and I empathize, but I never read ‘A 20-year-old girl who’s scared and alone and single had a miscarriage.’ And guess what — that happens all around the world every day,” the 22-year-old explained.
“I wanted to say something about it because when I was going through it, I was f—king alone,” she continued. “I didn’t know any artists I could have called and said, ‘Hey, I know this happened to you. What should I do? Can I go back on tour? How long did it take for your hormones to realign?’ I had no one to talk to.”
Halsey said that her own experience is why she’s an avid and vocal supporter of Planned Parenthood, which is where she sought care when she suffered her miscarriage. She donated $100,000 to the organization, which she claims led to a slew of backlash from all sides.
“All the responses were like, ‘Well, if you have $100,000 to donate, why did you have to go to Planned Parenthood?’ Other people have controlled this negative narrative that it’s a low-income place, this place in the ghetto, this place for abortions, this place where drug users go, this place where ‘slutty’ girls go,” she vented. “I say ‘slutty’ in quotes because I’m rolling my eyes at it. But it’s a doctor’s office. I can afford some of the best healthcare in the f—king world and I still went there, because I trust it.”
The “Now or Never” singer also expressed her frustration at identifying as black despite describing herself as “white-passing.”
“I’ve accepted that about myself and have never tried to control anything about black culture that’s not mine. I’m proud to be in a biracial family, I’m proud of who I am, and I’m proud of my hair,” she said, despite often buzzing off her hair or rocking wigs. She added, “”Every now and then I experience these racial blips. I look like a white girl, but I don’t feel like one. I’m a black woman. So it’s been weird navigating that. When I was growing up I didn’t know if I was supposed to love TLC or Britney.”
She’s also run up against a surprisingly frequent racial annoyance.
“One of my big jokes a long time ago was ‘I look white, but I still have white boys in my life asking me why my nipples are brown,” she said.
gypsywhisperer on August 31st, 2017 at 05:03 UTC »
I know three women who have experienced miscarriages that I've known.
My mother had 5 of them, and I was 4 when her last one happened and she didn't know what to do. I tried to help her, but her Fallopian tube ruptured and she almost died.
My sister in law had one and I spent the day with her and got her some pads and took her for lunch and got her wine. It was sad, because it's a loss and it was at 9 weeks so she was almost at the "safe point" but she just needed people with her.
My teacher had one too. She was almost 40 and told she'd never have kids. She was 6 weeks pregnant and miscarried in a hotel room while she was at a conference without her husband. She was alone. She and her husband shared her story at a school meeting and they later went on to adopt 2 kids and they are such great parents. They adopted a 7 year old and a 9 year old who were biological siblings.
No matter the circumstances, a miscarriage is sad. Even if it wasn't a wanted pregnancy. Because then the end of it wasn't on their terms.
chakni on August 31st, 2017 at 04:30 UTC »
For me at age 20 having a miscarriage was probably the best thing that happened to me. I was in a relationship but still, scared and alone. Searching for a place to get an abortion done and thinking about how I was going to pay for it. So when I did miscarry I literally cried because of the relief I experienced which mostly stemmed from the reason that abortions are frowned upon and people are nicer if you say you miscarried.
fire_thorn on August 31st, 2017 at 03:38 UTC »
If she was just an average 20 year old who miscarried, people would be telling her it was for the best and that she can have a baby one day when she's ready. Those were things I did not need to hear when I had miscarriages at 19 and 21.