Barrett is wrong: Adoption doesn’t ‘take care of’ the burden of motherhood

The most common reason women cite for relinquishing — by far — is money. I remember speaking with Emily, who, at age 19, had become pregnant with her second child. She was raising her 4-year-old son and was planning to raise her second. Emily described one evening spent sitting in her car in a grocery store parking lot, using the store’s free WiFi to complete her homework while her son napped in the back seat. She was determined to finish high school so she could get a better job and support her children. “And I just burst into tears,” she told me. “I just realized I couldn’t take him. I couldn’t take care of him.” She met with an agency the following week and relinquished her baby when he was born. When we spoke, she had not had contact with him for two years. Many women like Emily turn to adoption when parenting no longer feels tenable and their hopes for their families are thwarted. For them, adoption is not about averting abortion but about a system that makes parenthood a privilege that is beyond their reach.