Researchers got 2,700 college students from five countries to progressively narrow down which characteristics were most important to them in a lifetime mate, and the one that emerged from all cultures was kindness.

Authored by time.com and submitted by mvea

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shibbyhornet28 on September 20th, 2019 at 02:39 UTC »

The way they got these ratings seems pretty ridiculous. You can see the questionnaire in the third attachment to the study https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/jopy.12514 . They took eight traits and seemingly completely made up what a percentile breakdown for each would look like, then asked people to choose percentiles for each adding up to a certain amount in total. If you look at what the 50th percentile for each category adds up to, presumably the most average person, they:

-(Physical attractiveness): Are pleasant-looking with nice features

-(Financial prospects): Can pay all costs of living plus provide a disposable income

-(Creativity): Can write poetry or play music

-(Kindness): Are usually helpful to close friends

-(Humor): Can tell a few good jokes

-(Religiosity): Attend mandatory services and some non-mandatory services

-(Chastity): Are "somewhat hesitant" to have sex outside your relationship

-(Wants children): Want an "average number of children"

I mean, if you ask people to compare kindness to whether someone wants the most children and has memorized jokes...yeah, they're going to say kindness is better.

runvnc on September 20th, 2019 at 01:09 UTC »

I wonder if anyone has any study results handy that show the degrees to which people's self-reported motivations actually align with the ones apparent from their real reactions/behaviors.

blister333 on September 20th, 2019 at 01:03 UTC »

I question how much people consciously know what they want